Dear Dave,
I even have a roommate and we have been sharing the identical two-bedroom apartment for about three years. During this time we at all times had an agreement that we might split the bills in half. But for the past few months he has been paying half of his bills very late. There were even a number of times where he didn’t pay his share in any respect and I needed to foot the whole bill. We each have good jobs, so money is not a difficulty. He says he’s broke, but once I ask him where all his money goes he just shrugs and acts like he doesn’t know. We are good friends, so I don’t desire to be cruel. How can I approach him in regards to the situation?
Mikhail
Dear Mikhail,
Whether you are talking about friendships or business relationships, being unclear means being unkind. Believe me, I understand that you don’t need to be mean to a friend. But situations like this could at all times be addressed directly and quickly before things get out of hand.
You said you were good friends and not only roommates, right? My advice is to suggest a night where the 2 of you only hang around on the apartment. Offer to pay for dinner delivery and just calm down and watch a movie or game together. Before the night is over, tell him that there’s something you will have at all times desired to talk over with him about and begin an understanding but firm conversation about the previous few months and the bill situation. Let him know that he’s friend and that you just enjoy his company, however the roommate agreement is not working because he is not honoring his agreement to pay half the bills. Give him every likelihood to provide an inexpensive explanation for things, but ensure that he understands that if he doesn’t pay on time, the 2 of you will not have the option to live together for much longer.
Understanding is essential in a situation like this, Mikhail. You don’t desire to approach him with a bunch of accusations, but at the identical time it is advisable to know what is going on on. Maybe he needs help learning how one can budget properly. You said you each had good jobs, which implies his money has to go somewhere. The problem is that it appears like it is not attending to the correct places.
If a friend is having a tough time, it is best to at all times do what you possibly can reasonably do to assist. But on this case he has obligations that he must fulfill – and which he has agreed to. Do what you possibly can, but ultimately he should understand that it is time for him to drag himself together.
–Dave
