Confidence and self-esteem are perhaps among the most admirable qualities someone can have. But if we aren’t taught to be confident at a young age, it could actually result in a confident, insecure adult life.
“Happiness comes in many forms and we want our children to have skills that increase their confidence,” he says Eva Moskowitz, Ph.D.CEO of the charter school system Success Academy and creator of A+ Parenting: The Surprisingly Entertaining Guide to Raising Surprisingly Smart Kids.
“In a highly scheduled and hectic world with many external events occurring on a regular basis, we can forget that intellectual engagement is actually a pretty important part of a child’s happiness and self-confidence,” shares Moskowitz Assets.
The educator and mother of three children deals with the query of how you can educate and motivate children in order that they turn into more self-confident and happier.
Pushing children beyond the “easy.”
Parents and educators often consider that confidence grows when children complete tasks which are easy to perform, Moskowitz says. However, in your experience, this is never the case.
“Confidence develops when children overcome a fight – when they are given a difficult math problem or face a difficult opponent,” she says. “When they are given a difficult learning task and they make it through to the other side, that is what builds confidence. And we take that away from the kids at our peril and, frankly, at their own peril.”
In a world of quick gratification, it could actually be easy to turn into fed up if we do not achieve immediate success. But success and confidence come from overcoming and recovering from failure, says Moskowitz. Plus, it feels great to finally achieve something you have been working towards.
“I think we’ve lost a little bit of the feeling that the most successful people have failed before,” she says.
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Sports and clubs can teach some skills higher than within the classroom
Extracurricular activities akin to sports, drama, debate teams and other clubs play a vital role in forming what Moskowitz calls “intellectually vibrant” children – who’re intellectually stimulated, energized and challenged – which builds self-confidence and happiness.
“The idea of recovering from failure and instilling the need for resilience is sometimes easier to teach in sports or other team activities than in the classroom,” she says. “Take confidence; This can be achieved in theater and debate team in a way that is more difficult to develop in, say, an English or math class.”
But Moskowitz worries about barriers that make it difficult for youngsters to have these experiences. For example, economic aspects may make it difficult for some children to take part in extracurricular activities that they may enjoy, akin to paid sports or purchasing playground equipment.
Teaching coping mechanisms for anxiety and stress
School, home life, friendships, extracurricular activities, and even things like looks and crushes are all aspects that weigh heavily on children of all ages and might lead to emphasize and anxiety.
Anxiety disorders in childhood According to the National Institute of Mental Health, it affects one in eight children and nearly one in 4 teenagers. Fear can weaken self-confidence, but a bit of little bit of it is definitely normal and healthy, says Moskowitz: “It’s a bit of a Goldilocks theory.”
Every child responds to stressors in another way, so it is important to be in tune along with your child’s behavior and listen to how they respond to highschool demands or their social environment, says Moskowitz.
“Most children can learn to deal with stress,” she says. “You’re not going to be able to completely protect them from the pressures of the outside world, whether it’s economic pressures or any other influences in their lives or, frankly, world events.”
She adds, “We really owe it to our children to treat them in a way that allows them to cope with these stressors and to be able to talk to them about what they’re feeling and how to deal with those feelings.”
To help a baby with anxiety, try teaching them the next 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 grounding method– or a version of I spy. Ask them to discover five things they will see, 4 things they will touch, three things they will hear, two things they will smell, and one thing they will taste. This will help activate their senses and calm their nerves. This method might be useful at any age.
When a baby has the tools to ground themselves and knows how you can discuss their feelings, they might be confident of their ability to deal with stress and anxiety.
Parents: Have fun being a parent
It’s easy to get caught up within the hustle and bustle of parenthood: hectic school drop-offs, overtired kids (and yourself), 1,000,000 and one items on a never-ending to-do list. But children also sense after they are stressed.
“If you force your parenting anxiety and stress on your children, they won’t enjoy their childhood as much as they could, and you won’t enjoy parenting,” Moskowitz says. “And it’s really essential that the kid knows that they enjoy being a parent her Parent.”
Watch movies and TV shows along with your children You really have a good time and play games You I prefer to play, she says. Do this stuff not only to bond with one another, but in addition to be sure that you’re completely happy.
“There’s a model of parenting that’s all about self-sacrifice, and if you’re not careful, all the joy of parenting can be taken away from you,” Moskowitz says. “And that will have a negative impact on your children.”
More parenting suggestions:
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