Any estate planning attorney who drafts wills, trusts, powers of attorney, and healthcare directives would let you know something frustrating: Some clients don’t sign anything the attorney has prepared. This problem just isn’t limited to adult children of aging parents. It affects each single people and married couples.
Last will
In a recent conversation on AgingParents.com with an older woman (EW), she told me about it herself. She contacted us because she and her husband are each over 70 and she or he was apprehensive. Just a few years ago he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. They haven’t any children. She consulted a lawyer who prepared all of the needed documents. However, she decided to not sign any of the papers. Her reasons were vague: I didn’t know if the lawyer had missed something. Maybe I didn’t give him all the knowledge. I wanted to debate this with another person. Her alternative was to get a Durable Power of Attorney (DPOA) from the web and ask her husband to sign it in front of a notary at an area mall. She didn’t name anyone in case she herself was affected. That’s all she has to do on behalf of her husband. It occurred to her that she had done nothing to make sure her husband’s care and safety should she turn into ailing or die. There was nobody to legally act of their place. This might be an enormous mess!
Fear and inaction
Maybe EW is apprehensive because she will’t fully face her own mortality. She might also be in denial that her husband’s Alzheimer’s is getting worse over time and we haven’t any medication to stop this decline. She sounds scared. She says, “I’m stuck,” and at last decides to get advice. In truth, she’s not stuck, she’s stubborn. She didn’t follow the legal advice she had presumably previously received from her lawyer.
What to do?
EW needs a method. Since she has no family or children to assist her, she must discover a trustworthy friend who will act on her or her husband’s behalf when needed. If she dies before her husband does, someone can have to fill the void she now occupies. This person could also be appointed as her own representative or as her husband’s representative to handle financial matters if each turn into incapacitated.
friend or trustee
If there isn’t a capable and willing friend for this potentially difficult task, she may hire a licensed fiduciary to do it. In addition to appointing someone to handle funds during their lifetime, they have to also appoint someone to handle medical issues if either cannot speak for themselves. This is completed with a health care directive, sometimes called a health care power of attorney. A notable consideration about who’s suitable for this job is to take into consideration who can advocate for one’s wishes at the tip of life. Advocating on your wishes with doctors and other healthcare providers could be difficult.
fill gaps
The advice we give her at AgingParents.com is to proceed to sign what her attorney has previously prepared for her unless it’s outdated or not appropriate to the present circumstances. We review these documents to make sure all the pieces she might have is taken into consideration. The attorney she previously hired may make additional changes or rewording at any time. I’ll help her select the appropriate friend or trustee to function her and her husband’s agent for the health care directive that has already been written. She can add this name and phone information and sign the document. She may also add this name to the ability of attorney document. Then each are protected.
obstacles with their trust
One of the couple’s investment accounts required a call from the account holder, who was her incapacitated husband. They called him and asked questions. He couldn’t answer them. The institute then froze the account. Neither she nor her husband had access to it because it was a part of their trust. The foundation required that the husband’s financial incapacity to make decisions be proven by a medical certificate. EW didn’t understand this, but luckily she was in a position to do it easily. I told her to maneuver and do it immediately. Once she received the doctor’s letter and sent it to the institution, she can be the person in charge and would have access to the account since she was the legal successor to her husband, who was accountable for that account. Should EW even be impacted, the newly appointed person it designates would have the authority to make account decisions.
The takeaways here:
- Once you or your elderly loved one has consulted with an estate planning attorney and properly prepared the estate documents, make sure you sign them. A stubborn refusal can lead to a serious mess and cause the estate to lose money unnecessarily in legal fees and taxes.
- They’re not stuck, like EW said. No one forced them to forego obtaining the right documents. She was stubborn because she didn’t get anywhere and didn’t sign anything.
- The fear of 1’s own mortality could be overcome. If you do not know who to call in your documents as a backup for yourself, seek advice and select someone or appoint a trustee. Protect yourself, your estate and any affected family members by doing the appropriate thing.
